Zero is the number of games my older son’s suburban/travel basketball team won this season. Not a single game. I think they ended up 0-22, with tournament games included. We still cheered him and his team on from the audience and we commented on his good plays. We were his biggest fans, my wife and his brothers and I. He shrugged off the kudos, though, and while he was disappointed by how his team fared in a very difficult league, he could at least laugh about it from time to time. Still, it was difficult for him. He loves basketball. He loves playing competitive basketball. And he’d like to win once in a while. There are only so many words we can give him to buffer that frustration.
In contrast, his younger brother (our middle son) was on a similar travel team for his age bracket that went to its championship game yesterday and won so handily and by such a large margin that my son, afterwards, commented to a friend in our van, “I sort of feel sorry for them (the other team), to have their season end that way.” He said it very compassionately, as if he was thinking the roles could have been easily reversed. Maybe he was thinking of his older brother. He had noticed the tears that some of the opposing team’s players were shedding at the end.
And then there is the little brother, who played on a recreation team for first graders. You would think he would have some solid skills from all those times in the gym, watching his older brothers. But .. no. Not yet, anyway. Mostly, he stood around on the court, watching the action pass him by or was running and jumping so much he could not even catch the ball. He still has trouble dribbling. The basket seems miles away when he shoots. If he shoots. He almost never touched the ball during games. But he had a lot of fun out there. And we cheered him on as much as we cheered on “the brothers.”
So, what does his coach give their team? A massive trophy. Yep, the little one who did the least on the court gets the biggest trophy. Which he has been polishing. (I won’t digress into the topic of trophies for young children, except to say that I don’t see the need.)
And so ends the youth basketball season for us. Sort of. My older son is now on a AAU travel team that we hope will win a few games this season. We hope.
Peace (on the court),
Kevin
Ah, competitive sports. I liked how you focused on your boys’ reactions to their various seasons. (I am sure there are many other tangents you could have taken.)
I hear you and completely agree regarding the trophy for the first grader. We are sending so many mixed messages to our young ones, happens all the time here. Loved how you focused on each son and what their season brought them this year.
I with you on the trophies for all idea. I imagine you all spend a lot of time court side! This line, “There are only so many words we can give him to buffer that frustration.” stood out for me.I wanted to know more there. I’ve had similar conversations with my son after losing soccer games, or after games where he didn’t feel like he got much playing time. Those are tough conversations.
Ahhh, life with boys and sports. A lot of memories came creeping up on my as I read this. Have fun with AAU time. And I hope they win at least one
My younger son played on a travel team from third grade through high school. I loved those years- the traveling tournaments, the camaraderie between the boys, the “family” feel of the team. He stopped playing with them last year and I really miss it. I still go see the other kids every chance I get. Enjoy, enjoy, enjoy.
Also, I so agree with you about the winning/losing/trophy thing.